


New Beginnings

by azkadammit



Series: Marauders era [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-30
Updated: 2018-02-19
Packaged: 2019-03-11 08:43:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13520670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/azkadammit/pseuds/azkadammit
Summary: Part 1 of my marauders era series. First year 1971 - 1972 and Second year 1972 - 1973  (from Remus Lupins point of view).Each Part will be 2 years besides their Fifth year 1975 - 1976.( 1-2 (part 1) 3-4 (part 2) 5 (part 3) 6-7 (part 4) after school (part 5))





	1. The Ride

**Author's Note:**

> This is chapter 1 of the first story :) I don’t usually write stories at all. This is actually my first every Fanfic, I hope you guys enjoy! And I’m sorry for any mistakes I have made grammaticaly. <3

Platform 9 3/4 at King’s cross station, precisely 10:30 am, 30 minutes until the train leaves the station for my first term.

  
“You’ll do just fine Rem, Dumbledore already has a plan for you.” my mother whispered, placing a loose strand of my blond curly hair behind my ear. She knew I was nervous about how I would handle this ‘condition’ as my mother called it. To me it was more of a curse than a condition, something that I would never want to inflict on anyone, not even my worst enemies. I am a werewolf, I have been since I was little. When I was attacked by the unregistered werewolf known as Fenrir Greyback. That is a different story, for a different day. I was headed to my first year at the finest school of witchcraft and wizardry, Hogwarts. My parents gave me a tight hug before going off to talk to their friends until the train left. Nervous first years and returning students voices buzzed around inside my head causing me to lose track of my thoughts and accidentally bump into the trolley of an antsy boy with messy black hair, who looked to be around my own age.

  
“S-sorry.” I stammered as I hurriedly helped the boy I knocked over pick up his things, a light flush rising to my cheeks in embarrassment. Already ruining things and you’re not even at the school yet, I mentally scolded myself.

  
“I’m alright, are you okay?” The messy haired boy asked, standing back up and brushing his pants off. I nodded in response stacking the last of the boys things back onto his trolley.

  
“I’m James, James Potter.” He stuck out his hand toward me and smiled making his dimples prominent on his cheeks, I ignored his attempt to shake my hand.

  
“Remus Lupin, nice to meet you.” I said barely loud enough for James to hear and returned the smile with an awkward one of my own. I’m still embarrassed about running into the boy in the first place. James’ smile didn’t fall, in fact his smile started to expand and reach from ear to ear.

  
“Is this your first year here? I’m starting my first year and I’m so excited, I can’t wait for Quidditch to start up, even though I can’t play I intend to be the youngest Quidditch team member in history.” His voice boomed with excitement. I was going to answer until the platform suddenly grew so silent you could drop a pin. James’ smile faded from his face as he turned towards the entrance to the platform, I followed his movement.

Walking through the crowd of silent families, who spread like the sea, was a family of four. The first being young boy with very short black hair and clean features, followed an older boy with curly black hair tied into a bun with a few strands in front and their two parents who both looked haughtily as they strutted down walkway that was made for them. The curly haired boy was the messiest looking one of the group, don’t get me wrong he was very well-dressed and his face still looked elegant but his facial expression faltered by the smirk of smugness. As the platform returned to normal I turned back to my trolley and brought it to the train. My parents returned to say their goodbyes and gave me a hug.

  
“Don’t forget to have fun, make some friends. We’ll owl you every day.” My mother gushed holding back tears holding me in a tight hug. I had always had trouble making friends because of the scars that were prominently displayed across my face. I boarded the train with my trunk and started looking for a compartment to sit in.

  
“Remus, Sit here!” A familiar voice shouted from behind me, I turned around to find James poking his head out of a compartment with his smile back on his face, Hesitantly I entered James’ compartment. The smug looking boy was also in the compartment, his shirt that was once buttoned was now halfway unbuttoned and his face looked more relaxed than it did on the platform.

  
“Thank you.” I mumbled as I pushed my trunk up onto the rack above the seats before sitting next to James, who was in the corner seat across from the boy with the bun. I started tugging at the sleeves of my baggy jumper to pull my sleeves over the scars on my hands. I have always been self-conscious of my scars, I think they are ugly and are caused by his curse. Stupid werewolves.  
I felt the train jerk and a loud whistle rang through my ears. This is it, no turning back now.

  
“Can we sit with you lot? All the other compartments are full.” A fiery haired girl asked standing in the doorway with a scrawny black haired boy behind her. I watched silently as James sat up straighter and his smile broaden at the sight of the fiery haired girl.

  
“Go ahead, the more the merrier!” James exclaimed excitedly gesturing to the empty seats. I glanced at the boy with a bun, who I still didn’t know the name of, a smirk etched across the boys face as the black haired boy walked into the compartment.

  
“Finally found yourself a little girlfriend, eh  
Snivellus?” The boy with the bun sneered at the black haired boy. James chuckled at the remark but tried to hide his laughter. The black haired boy curled his hands into fists and his eyebrows furrowed, the fiery haired girl glared at the boy with a bun.

  
“Shut your mouth Sirius, you insufferable prick.” The black haired boy hissed causing Sirius to smirk and raise his hands in defense.

  
“Sev, don’t start this.” The fiery girl said grabbing onto one of Sev’s hand before turning back to James.

  
“Thank you for the offer, but we’ll sit elsewhere.” She turned on her heels before pushing Snape out of the door and slamming it behind her. Sirius put his hands down and started talking to James about Quidditch. I pulled my knees to my chest leaning against the wall and resting my forehead on my knees to hide my face before falling asleep, the full moon was in 4 days, and I needed all the energy I could save up.

“Want anything off the trolley dears?” A sweet voice chimes through my ears waking me up from the nap. I opened my eyes watching as Sirius and James buy nearly everything. Stretching back to a normal seated position, I reached into my pocket and pulled out a small amount of money before stuffing it back into my pocket.

  
“Is that all dears?” The trolley witch asked, a muffled ‘yes’ and ‘thank you’ came from both of the other boys’ stuffed faces and I nodded. I pulled my knees back up to my chest and rested my chin on my knees staring out of the window into the corridor. The train ride went smoothly for the rest of the trip besides when Sirius and James decided to play mini Quidditch with one of their shoes and a empty box, don’t question it. _I think I’m going to like this year._


	2. The Sorting Hat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus gets to Hogwarts and is sorted. This sorting changes the whole entire course of his life.

We finally stopped at Hogwarts after multiple fights between Sirius and James about who won their ‘Quidditch’ game, along with multiple complaints from Sirius about how I wouldn’t accept any food from him. On the platform the group of first years were gathered in a circle. There weren’t many first years oddly enough, maybe around 10 students. There was a man holding a lantern above them all, he was wearing a black trench coat and looked very old.

“This way first years!” The old man said and started walking towards a dock where we got into small boats and started across the black lake that looked as if it was made of black glass. Hogwarts was right in front of them surrounded by mountains, the moon and the candle light from the castle windows were the only thing lighting the night. Gasps of amazement were shared throughout the small group of kids as the boats were moving by themselves and the view of the castle got closer.

“I bet you a galleon to jump in.” Sirius said to James. James smirked, bloody hell he’s going to do it. James’ hand plunged into the cold water and splashed Sirius, which got everyone else wet on our tiny boat. The other boy in our boat that had blond greasy hair and small watery eyes, squealed almost exactly like a rat after he got wet. Once they docked at the bottom of the castle grounds they made their way up to the castle and were lead the way to a room where they will wait until further notice.

“This place is magnificent!” The girl from the train squealed in excitement to Severus. A buzz of conversation sprung up around the room, I was still shivering from the cold splashes of water. Sirius and James were still bickering about their ‘Quidditch’ match like an old married couple. The two boys quickly became friends, which was good, but I was having a hard time accepting the fact that anyone wanted to be friends with me. James was very nice and funny but I don’t think I could keep up with those two.

“You’ll never make friends, freak.” A voice hissed inside of my head. The voice of Fenrir Greyback, he haunts me to this day. He haunts me every full moon and every time I look into the mirror. I hate it, I hate him. My train of thought was broken by the door opening slightly before closing and revealing a woman with a black braid specked with pieces of grey laying across one of her shoulders. She was wearing an emerald green cloak, round glasses and a black pointed hat.

“I am Professor McGonagall, I’m here to escort you to the start-of-term banquet which will begin shortly, but before you take your seats in the Great Hall, you will be sorted into your houses. The Sorting is a very important ceremony because, while you are here, your house will be something like your family within Hogwarts.” She said as if she’s memorized every line. With a smile she looked around the 1st year group and continued.

“You will have classes with the rest of your house, sleep in your house dormitory and spend free time in your house common-room. The four houses are called Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin.” Her eyes landed on me and her smile widened.

“Each house has its own noble history and each has produced outstanding wizards and witches. While you are at Hogwarts, your triumphs will earn your house points, while any rule-breaking will lose house points.” Her eyes landed on James and Sirius with a knowing look as Sirius was pretending to make his hand mimic her words mockingly.

“At the end of the year, the house with the most points is awarded the house cup, a great honor. I hope each of you will be a credit to whichever house becomes yours.” She paused glancing over all the students again, a flash of mischievousness washed over her face before vanishing, and she continued.

“The Sorting Ceremony will take place in a few minutes in front of the rest of the school. I suggest you all smarten yourselves up as much as you can while you are waiting.” She turned on her heels and walked back out of the doors. Students started whispering nervously about what she meant. My mouth was open in shock from the last words, I didn’t know any real magic yet. Why didn’t my parents tell me about the ceremony? Does it hurt?

“Follow me, please.” McGonagall said as she returned through the doors which felt like merely seconds ago before pushing through the doors again and the group filed through. When I looked up there were four long table full of students who cheered as we walked in. Candles floated above as if they were held up by string, lighting up the ceiling which looked as if it was the sky. At the very front was one large table where the professors sat, Dumbledore was in the middle. I had met with Dumbledore last month to discuss my ‘situation’ he told me that there would be a safe place for the full moons and that there would be a healer on standby every moon. We made it up to a platform in front of the tables where there was a stool with a brown old hat sat on top of it. The hat moved slightly, I rubbed my eyes in disbelief, the hat split open revealing a face that wasn’t there before. It started to sing.

“Oh you may not think I'm pretty, but don't judge on what you see, I'll eat myself if you can find a smarter hat than me. You can keep your bowlers black, Your top hats sleek and tall, For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat and I can cap them all. There's nothing hidden in your head the Sorting Hat can't see, so try me on and I will tell you where you ought to be.” The hat paused before continuing the song.

“You might belong in Gryffindor, where dwell the brave at heart, their daring, nerve, and chivalry set Gryffindors apart; You might belong in Hufflepuff, where they are just and loyal, those patient Hufflepuffs are true and unafraid of toil; or yet in wise old Ravenclaw, if you've a ready mind, where those of wit and learning, will always find their kind; Or perhaps in Slytherin you'll make your real friends, those cunning folks use any means to achieve their ends.” The hat paused again, his voice sounding more of a hiss as he talked about Slytherin.

“So put me on! Don't be afraid! And don't get in a flap! You're in safe hands, though I have none, For I'm a Thinking Cap!” The crowd of students erupted with cheers at the end of the song. Professor McGonagall approached the chair and rolled out a piece of parchment.

“When I call your name, you will put on the hat and sit on the stool to be sorted.” She said before pushing her glasses higher on her nose and began reading the parchment.

“Batt, Claire.” A red haired girl walked up to the stool fidgeting with the sleeves of her robes, she sat down and placed the hat upon her head where it dropped over her eyes.

“Gryffindor!” Shouted the hat after a brief pause. Claire stood up and walked towards one of the tables near the middle that was cheering.

“Berri, Eleanor.” “Hufflepuff!” The hat shouted again and a brunette girl walked to a table on the right.

“Black, Sirius.” The entire hall went silent almost immediately as his name was called. Sirius walked up to the chair with a nervous smile plastered on his face, he sat on the stool and the hat was placed over his eyes.

• Sirius P.O.V •  
“Black, Sirius” McGonagall called out looking around the crowd before her eyes landed on me. A ringing started to bellow in my ears as the entire hall went silent, I took a deep shaky breath before finding the courage to walk up to the stool. Faking a smile that probably looked more nervous than happy I sat down and placed the hat on my head, everything went dark as I stared into the rim of the hat.

“Hmm.” A voice rang through his ears. “Another Black, I know where to put you.”

“Don’t you dare.” My own voice hissed back at the voice ringing through my ears.

“Rude, but daring. Curious, very curious.” The voice cooed.

“Gryffindor!” The hat shouted, the ringing in my ears vanished. The hall started to buzz with whispers, I knew it was about me but I don’t care. As the Gryffindor table erupted in a huge roar of cheers, I smiled before hopping off of the stool and joining the Gryffindor table. People patted my back and I ignored the hate filled stares from his relatives at the Slytherin table.

• Remus P.O.V •

“Doyle, Stebbins.” “Hufflepuff!”

“Evans, Lily.” The fiery haired girl from the train walked up to the stool and sat down, the hat barely touched her head before shouting.

“Gryffindor!” Her smile faded as she looked at Severus who was still in the small crowd, his face looked shocked and a bit disappointed at the sorting of his friend. Lily slowly stood up before joining the roaring table.

“Higgs, Charolette.” “Slytherin!”  
“Janus, Adrian.” “Ravenclaw!”

“Keddle, Juliette.” A very short pink haired girl strutted up to the stool before plopping down with a large grin spread across her pale face. I have never seen someone with such pink hair in my whole life, scratch that, I have never seen anyone with pink hair. The sorting hat fell over her face slightly covering her nose before shouting.

“Gryffindor!” The hat was lifted off of her head and I swear her hair turned into the most vibrant pink I have ever seen as she stood up and strutted to the Gryffindor table. Everyone was watching her vibrant pink hair bounce as she walked.

“Lupin, Remus.” My breath hitched in my throat and a huge wave of heat spread across my face staining my cheeks bright red. Breathe Remus, you’ll be okay. I stumbled towards the stool before shakily sitting down. Gripping the edges of the stool so tight my knuckles turned a bright white. I closed my eyes as the hat was placed onto my head, the hat paused for what felt like an eternity.

“Must be, Gryffindor!” The hat shouted, and the Gryffindor table once again cheered. I stood up almost forgetting to take off the hat and walked hurriedly towards the table. I sat next to Sirius and stared at the plate in front of me trying to relax my breathing.

“Pettigrew, Peter.” The blond watery eyed boy from the boat waddled up to the stool and sat down, the hat sat upon his head for a couple minutes.

“Gryffindor!” Peter waddled to the table and sat across from Sirius and I, next to a sulking Lily who was staring across the hall at Severus who was avoiding her. I felt sorry for her.

“Potter, James.” James strutted up to the stool and sat down, The hat didn’t even seem to touch his head before giving the answer.

“Gryffindor!” I clapped along with everyone else, besides Lily who was too transfixed on the black haired boy who was standing alone.

“Snape, Severus.” He walked up to the stool looking gloomier than when I first met him on the train. He knew where he was going to be sorted, and he didn’t like it, he wanted to be with Lily.

“Slytherin!” The hat hissed, Severus trudged to the table where he was welcomed with cheers. That was the end of the sorting ceremony, Professor McGonagall rolled up the parchment, grabbed the hat and stool before walking off of the platform. Professor Dumbledore rose from his seat beaming at all the students.

“Welcome to a new year at Hogwarts. Before we begin our banquet I would like to say a few words, Nitwit, blubber, oddment, tweak, thank you.” He sat back down with a wide smile on his face, he truly is mad. I looked back at the table as the dishes in front of me were filled with large amounts of food. New students gasped at the sight of the food that was suddenly on the plates, I looked around at the small group of people around me. James’ plate was piled high with loads of food that all mushed together, clearly he was very hungry. Sirius’ plate was filled with the most extravagant assortment of food. Peter had almost one of everything on his plate neatly split into sections of types of food. I grabbed small amounts of things I like, I am usually a very picky eater and don’t eat very much. I don’t know why, I’ve just always been this way.

After everyone was finished eating and the conversation died down as the students started to get tired. The food disappeared from the table, Professor Dumbledore stood up again.

“Just a few more words, I have a few start of term notices to give you. First years should note that the forest on the grounds is forbidden for all students. I have also been reminded by Mr.Filch that no magic should be used between classes in the corridors. Quidditch tryouts will be hosted in the second week in the term, anyone interested in joining their house team should contact Madam Hooch.” Dumbledore smiled out at the crowd of students.

“Now, if you would please follow your prefects to your house dormitories.” Everyone stood up at the same time and followed each other out of the door. A hand grabbed onto my shoulder causing me to jump. I turned around to see Dumbledore with an apologetic smile.

“Didn’t mean to scare you Remus, would you please join me in my office?” Dumbledore asked, I nodded and followed him to a statue of a gargoyle.

“Sherbet lemon.” He said with a smile and the gargoyle steps aside showing a spiral staircase that lead to his office. The office is a large circular room with many windows and portraits of old headmasters and headmistresses. A large portrait of a grey haired man was hung above the desk in the middle of the room, Armando Dippet.

“We should discuss the plan for your, situation.” Dumbledore said, his half moon spectacles sliding halfway down his nose. My situation was the only thing interesting about me. I nodded, he pulled out a small map and laid it on his desk.

“This is a map of the school grounds. We have planted a whomping willow tree that has a tunnel which leads to a shack in Hogsmeade which has been prepared with plenty of sound protections. I have also spread a rumor that it is extremely haunted, so even if someone does end up hearing they will expect nothing more than freight from being haunted.” Dumbledore pointed at a spot on the map labeled ‘whomping willow’.

“Every morning Madam Pomfrey will tend to your wounds and your Professors will be notified to give you extra time to finish assignments during the week.” I nodded taking everything in, all of this trouble because you’re a monster. I furrowed my eyebrows in frustration, I wish I could just be a normal kid.

“Come to me if you have any questions. I think you should head to sleep, long day ahead tomorrow.” Dumbledore smiled and folded up the map before handing it to me. I tucked the map into my robe pockets and smiled weakly back at Dumbledore before exchanging goodbyes.

“By the way Remus, the password is dilligrout.” I left his office and made my way back to the common rooms, where I was led to the first years’ dormitory. James, Peter and Sirius were already fast asleep, all of them snoring softly. I quietly sat down on the empty bed and took my shoes off. I changed from my school robes into a jumper and pj pants before climbing under the sheets of the four-poster bed. Staring at the fabric that clung to the wooden posts holding the bed together, my mind started to wander.

I finally made it, was the last thought that passed through my head before I drifted to sleep.

He looked around his dark room searching for the cause of his sudden alertness. A cold wind whipped around his small frame canceling the warmth his blanket brought him. The window across the room was open and the whipping of his curtains against the window, cracks of thunder and the pattering of rain broke the silence of the night. Remus swung his legs over the edge of his bed and plopped onto the floor shivering at the contact of his cold floorboards. It was almost the end of February so it was still very cold. Remus walked across his room, his tiny feet padding across the floor before he dragged one of his small chairs in front of the window to close it. His arms barely could reach, but he eventually closed the window.

“Hello little one.” A deep hoarse voice croaked from behind Remus, almost as if it were a growl. Remus turned around almost falling off of the tiny chair. The man was slumped over heaving slightly, his face was covered by shoulder-length hair. Once the man looked up his eyes were glowing a deep yellow almost orange color, scars covering almost every inch of his face and continued to his neck. A smirk spread across his face as he watched the small boys face flash with a look of fear. The mans canine teeth were slightly overlapping his bottom lip.

“Don’t be afraid.” The man chuckled as he watched Remus slowly climb off of the chair. The hair on Remus’ back stood up at the sound of the mans chuckle. Pale blue light suddenly filled the room from the moon shining outside of the window, The man hunched over falling onto his hands and knees before bellowing out a low inhumane growl. His shoulder blades jutted out of the coat he was wearing, and he started to claw at the floorboards. Remus stood there, too shocked to even breathe. The man was transforming right in front of him, the man was becoming the monster he had always feared. The man started to move as if he were trying to break out of his own skin. His transformation was over, he was no longer a man he was a monster. In the corner of the once quiet room was a fully transformed werewolf staring hungrily at a 4-year-old Remus who could only breathe as if he were gasping for air, trembling as if he were going to shatter any minute. The monster sniffed at Remus as he prowled closer to the young boy. Remus stepped back as far as he could, trapping himself in the corner, the monster shook his head at the little boys actions and howled as he got closer. The sound of his parents blasting open the door could barely be heard over the sound of Remus’ racing heartbeat in his ears. The monster lunges at the small boy and sinks his teeth into his forearm causing a searing pain to shoot through his body and an ear-splitting scream to erupt from his throat, It all went black.

I woke up breathing heavily, my curls pressed against my forehead from the sweat. My forearm was searing with pain as it did when it got close to every full moon. I sat up and ran my finger through my curls before drawing back one of the curtains to check the time. 5 am, I groaned and swung my legs over the side of the bed before standing up. It wasn’t the first time I had this dream, in fact it was the only thing I remember from being little. I don’t remember when I used to be normal and happy. I shook my head, you need to shower. Grabbing a towel and clean clothes from my trunk and I headed to the bathroom that was connected to the dorm. The bathroom was sectioned into two parts, the bathroom stalls on the left and the shower stalls to the right. I placed my clothes on a counter before taking my jumper off and staring at myself in the mirror. Puffy scars traced every inch of my torso, some were fully healed and others were fresh from my last transformation. The bite mark on my forearm was red and puffy, every time the dream occurred it was like the bite had only just happened. I shook my head and furrowed my brows, not now. When I finished undressing I started a hot shower letting the hot water run down my body relaxing my tense muscles but also causing a stinging sensation as they water touched open wounds around my body.

Wrapping the towel around my hair after getting dressed into the uniform then I walked back into the dorm room.

“Remus?” A voice croaked from behind me, I jumped and quickly spun around, the towel fell off of my hair before I sighed in relief. It was just James, bloody hell.

“You’re going to end up killing him Fleamont if you don’t stop scaring him.” Sirius teased as he pulled his jumper over his uniform. His hair was still in a bun but it was even tighter than it was yesterday.

“I’m going to end up killing you if you don’t stop calling me Fleamont, you git.” James sneered and sat up. Peter snorted at the name as he was packing his bag full of quills and ink bottles. James glared at Peter and grabbed his clothes before stomping off like a four-year old to change into his uniform. I checked the clock next to my bed, 7 am, I grabbed my bag of books and other supplies, slipped on my shoes and headed down to the Great Hall for breakfast. I found Lily and Severus sitting outside of the Great Hall with plates of food on their laps talking about their houses, as soon as I entered the Great Hall there were already other students sitting at the tables eating their breakfast. I sat next to the pink haired girl named Juliette who was sleepily pushing bacon around on her plate. Pouring myself a cup of tea I took a deep inhale taking in the calming aroma and sipped it closing my eyes as the warm liquid slipped down my throat. My peace was interrupted by James and Sirius plopping down in front of me making me jump and spill some of my tea. Mentally rolling my eyes I looked up at the two boys who were staring at me expectantly.

“What?” I murmured my mouth still around the rim of the tea cup. They both looked at each other and James held up a piece of parchment that was folded up. I furrowed my eyebrows, what the bloody hell do I care about a stupid piece of parchment?

“We took it upon ourselves to grab your schedule for this term and luckily you have all the same classes as us.” Sirius exclaimed and James handed me the piece of paper. Great, this’ll be fun.

“Can’t wait.” I said sarcastically before rolling my eyes and downing the rest of my tea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to credit @asktheboywholived on tumblr for giving me the idea to write this book from their ‘so it begins’ posts. I also had to make up some characters because lack of information. 
> 
> *jazz hands* 
> 
> (My sister told me to put jazz hands at the end of the book. But I’m doing something better and putting it at the end of every chapter :D)


	3. The Moon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first week at Hogwarts has some ups and downs for the first years.

I went through my morning classes easy enough without having to talk to Sirius or James. During Potions and Charms I sat with Lily, Severus and Charlotte, a girl from Slytherin. Sirius and James were sitting with the pink haired girl named Juliette, she kept changing her hair color during class which amused the two boys causing them to disrupt the classes with laughter. I found out that Lily was a potions’ genius. 

During lunch, I read a book called “Of mice and men” by John Steinbeck, I raised my cup of tea and sipped it slowly letting the warm liquid soothe my sore throat. I was getting sick again, as I always did as the full moon approached. It’ll be my first full moon away from my parents and in a school full of thousands of students who could potentially be killed by one mistake. A loud crash silenced the buzzing hall, I looked up to see James and Sirius smirking down at Sev who was on the ground covered in food. 

“Watch where you’re walking Snivellus.” Sirius sneered earning a high-five from James as they walked towards the table laughing at the scene that they caused. Lily helped Sev up and brushed some food off of him before escorting him out of the hall. Sirius and James sat in the same spot they always did.

My head started pounding, it felt as if someone was using the inside of my brain as a punching bag. The buzz of the hall didn’t help much either, it sounded like a lot of bees swarming around my in head. I packed my things and headed to my next class trying to get some peace and quiet.

“Sev you have to ignore them, they’re just being pricks.” Lily’s voice sounded around the corner in the courtyard, I headed towards it to find Sev poking at a small bug with his wand and Lily sitting on a ledge watching him intently. I quietly walked over to Lily and placed a hand on her shoulder. 

“You know she’s right, they’re just arrogant gits.” I said, Sev looked back at me but immediately turned back to the bug before crushing it and standing up. 

“It’s just because they’re in Gryffindor.” Sev hissed, kicking a rock as he made his way back to the ledge where Lily and I were. Lily laughed and shook her head. 

“So you’re saying Rem and I are arrogant gits because we’re in Gryffindor?” Lily asked raising an eyebrow at him. Sev shook his head, and sat on a the ledge. 

“You don’t belong is Gryffindor, neither does Remus. Everyone else are just airheads.” He sighed twirling his wand between his fingers, Lily leaned over and rested her head on his shoulder. They’ve been friends since they were little, Lily used to be called a freak by her sister because of her powers. She grew up in a non-magic household but when she found Sev he started to teach her what he knew already. I softly patted Sevs other shoulder and returned on my path to the Muggle studies room. 

Muggle studies was terribly boring but I was looking forward to my astronomy class, but since I have to sit in between James and Sirius it almost made my favorite class intolerable. They kept sending tiny paper airplanes flying around the room with mean messages on them and pelting them at the back of Sevs head.

It’s also ironic that I love astronomy so much because you learn about the moon and stars and I’m basically allergic to the moon. Maybe it’s because of my ‘allergy’ that I’m attracted to the moon, Who knows. 

During dinner Lily, Sev and I went to the library to do a paper that was assigned for astronomy. Sev still had some pieces of parchment stuck in his hair from the attack of tiny airplanes in astronomy. I don’t understand why they picked on him, he didn’t do anything to them. Or maybe he did, even if he did he doesn’t deserve this. 

We finished our papers and headed to our dorms, Sev headed to the dungeons. Lily and I walked to the gryffindor common rooms. Suddenly Lily stopped right in front of the portrait of the fat lady, I turned around and furrowed my eyebrows. Lily’s face suddenly turning solemn. I grabbed both of her hands and sat her down on the nearest bench. She looked like she was going to break down crying at any moment. The waterfalls started flowing, I pulled her into my shoulder and rubbed circles into her back trying to calm her down. 

“I can’t believe you actually got into their common room! Sev is going to feel it in the morning.” Sirius’ voice echoed from around the corner, I rolled my eyes and waited for him to approach around the corner. They never came, I never saw him. I swear I just heard him. 

“I-Is he gone?” Lily breathed in between sobs. I nodded and she sat up straight and wiped her eyes with her sleeves. She took deep breaths before looking at me, her eyes were bloodshot and her cheeks were stained with tears. I stood up and straightened my jumper. 

“Let’s get you to bed.” She nodded and stood up. I grabbed her hand and lead her through the portrait. 

“You alright there Evans?” James said ruffling his hair to look even more messy, he always did that when he talked to her. Lily glared at him and gave me a hug before walking up to her dorm room. I wish I could’ve followed her to get away from them and talk about things more privately, but no boys are allowed up there. I walked up to the boys dorms ignoring James’ attempts to talk to me. He’s been trying to talk to me all day but I don’t want to talk to him, he’s mean to a kid who hasn’t done anything. If anything he should be picking on that seventh year Malfoy, even though Malfoy would kick his ass it’d be something I’d want to see. I climbed into bed after changing and stared at the fabric of the fourposter bed.

The past two days were boring but as the full moon is only hours away I felt sick, cold sweats, throwing up constantly. I could barely move but I still managed to get myself to sit in front of the fire with lily. She made me a hot cup of tea and brought down some chocolate. I love chocolate, tea doesn’t even come close to how much I love chocolate. After every transformation my mom would buy me a chocolate bar to last the rest of the week, it always made me feel better. Sirius, Peter, James and Juliette joined our small circle. 

Lily rested her head on Juliette’s shoulder, she didn’t leave because James and Sirius sat down. She just ignored them. Peter and James started playing a game using their wands to float a ball of paper through small hoops around the room. 

“You can use me as a pillow if you want.” Sirius whispered so no one would hear and patted his lap. I nodded and laid down resting my head onto his leg. Sirius joined Peter and James’ game, Lily went upstairs with Juliette, giving my hand a tight squeeze beforehand. I closed my eyes as the head began pounding again. 

A while later James, Sirius and Peter went to bed leaving me alone. I stood up shakily and headed out to the Whomping willow. My head was spinning and I was barely able to walk straight. I crawled through the tunnels of the tree and made it up to a room in the shack. 

• View change to Narrator Point!•

A small grey tabby cat sat in the corner of the room, probably a stray. It had the weirdest markings around its eyes, it looked as if it were wearing circle glasses.  
Remus smiled weakly at the cat and slid down the wall, leaning into a corner. 

Thunder cracked from outside and rain pounded on the roof. The small cat was sheltered under a small bedside table. As the cat watched Remus intensely a pale light lit up the room, the cat looked away from the boy curled into a ball whimpering in agony as his body started to change. His fingernails clawed against his body, drawing blood as his nails grew into claws. He swiftly rolled onto my hands and knees and breathe heavily trying to ease his pain. When shoulder blades jutted out tearing through the soft fabric of his shirt, he let out an inhumane howl of pain. After the transformation was complete. Remus was alone, clawing at his own skin as a helpless cat sat in the corner of the room just watching to see if he was going to be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *jazz hands* 
> 
> I originally posted chapter 3 this morning but I hated it so I deleted it and I’m shaving the stuff for later *wink* *wonk* 
> 
> Also if there is anything else you guys would like to see in this series lemme know! Your ideas might make it into the story :)


	4. I solemnly swear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus is healing from the full moon while James and Sirius try-out for Quidditch.

Today after dinner the Gryffindor team had Quidditch tryouts. James tried out for Chaser, which he probably got and I tried out for Keeper. When I was little I used to play Quidditch with my younger brother. On the rare occasion that my parents let us, when we had people over all of the kids would go out to our makeshift Quidditch pitch and play a couple games. 

“Thank you all for trying out, the results will be posted on the common room board by tomorrow.” The 6th year captain said, he dismissed us back to the locker rooms to change. It smelt like dirty old socks and new Quidditch gear, I probably smelt like a sweaty sock. James and I headed back to the castle holding our own brooms, a smirk spread across James’ face. 

“Race you to the common rooms!” James yelled as he quickly mounted his broom and flew through the corridors of the school, I jumped onto mine and followed him at full speed. Students screamed and jumped out of the way of our speeding brooms, I almost ran into a 4th year girl who didn’t move at all. 

I sped up and passed James, looking back I saw him stop in the middle of the hallway almost getting tossed off of his broom. When I looked forward there was an angry McGonagall standing there, arms crossed and a scowl etched across her face. I stopped abruptly and was thrown off of my broom and onto the floor in front of her, James tried to hold in a laugh but ended up snorting instead. 

“Both of you, my office. Now.” McGonagall sneered and held open a door for us. I stood up, grabbed my broom and walked into the office with James following me. I looked at James who was still smirking because I fell of my broom, I hit his shoulder with mine. 

“You could’ve killed someone.” McGonagall said as she walked into the office and sat down at her desk, James’ smirk was still on his face. She back and forth at both of us before shaking her head. 

“Detention for both of you, with Filch.” She said, James’ smirk faded and was replaced with a shocked open mouth. My face looked about the same as James’. Filch was the worst person to have detention with. 

“Are you serious?” I asked, she looked up at me from the piece of parchment she started to write on.

“No, I’m pretty sure you’re Sirius.” She teased and went back to writing on the piece of parchment. I’ve got to use that sometime, it was pretty good.

“Now please return, by foot, to the common room.” We nodded and walked out of her office. James’ smirk returned to his face, this kid is mental, and I loved it. We entered the common room and headed up to the dorm room. 

“Do you think we made the team? I was watching you and I think you made it.” James asked putting his broom next to his bed and taking his Quidditch Jersey off, I put my broom on my bed.

“I don’t know about me, but I was watching you play and I don’t think the other kid even knew how to ride his broom.” James laughed at my insult, His laugh is infectious so I ended up laughing too. I turned my back to him and took my jersey off, James’ laughing stopped abruptly. I turned around to him and tilted my head in confusion. 

“The marks. On your back.” James muttered under his breath. He’s talking about the scars from Walburga that she gave to me whenever I misbehaved. It’s just normal discipline. Right? 

“Oh, those old things? My mum was just punishing me for something I did wrong. Do you ever get disciplined or are you the golden child?” I teased, James’ smile didn’t return to his face. It was weird to see him like this, he’s usually happy and energetic. James shook his head slowly. 

“When I would get ‘punished’ it was just them taking away my broom or not letting me talk to my friends. Are you serious, that’s what your parents do to you?” James asked using his fingers to make quotation marks as he said punished. James looked as if he’s seen a ghost. 

“I am Sirius and you’re James.” I teased trying to lighten the mood, I hated this feeling of sadness that started to circle around the room. James probably was the Golden child, probably didn’t do anything majorly wrong. That’s why he didn’t get punished the same. 

“Can I see them?” James asked. I nodded and turned around again and looked over my shoulder to look at him. His face looked even paler than before. I turned to face him and slipped a clean shirt over my head. 

“We should go visit Remus.” I chimed, he’s been in the hospital wing for a whole week. We weren’t allowed to visit before because he was too weak. James nodded and pulled a jumper on. 

On the way to the hospital wing I couldn’t stop thinking. Why was James so weird when it come to seeing my scars? It’s not like most kids have it different. I’m pretty sure if anyone else saw it besides the ‘golden’ boy, they wouldn’t even flinch. 

 

• Remus P.O.V •

I sat in the hospital bed my legs criss-crossed, Lily was sitting at the end of the bed with a textbook on one knee and a piece of parchment on another text book in front of her. She was helping catch up on what I’ve missed. Madam Pomfrey didn’t allow anyone else in for the longest time until I told her I would end up failing if she didn’t let Lily in. Lily brought Sev along too, I didn’t mind him being here. The more the merrier right? 

“Remus? You have more visitors.” Madam Pomfrey said, I looked up. James, Sirius and Peter were behind Pomfrey, they all smiled and waved at me. Okay, maybe not always the merrier. They grabbed chairs and sat across the bed from Sev. 

“If any of you boys try and say anything mean to anyone, I will fight you.” I sneered, glaring mostly at James and Sirius. Peter, James and Sirius put their hands up in defense and shook their heads. 

“We solemnity swear.” They said in unison before looking at each other and bursting out in laughter. Jesus, they act like they’re triplets. Lily closed her book and put her things away into her bag, I placed my books on the bedside table and leaned back against the headrest. 

“I should be able to come back to classes by Monday.” I said and Lily’s face lit up with a smile. She bounced excitedly. 

“Finally I don’t have to be stuck in a group with those two!” She said pointing at James and Sirius. Sev laughed as the two boys pouted. 

“C’mon Evans. You loved being our partner and almost getting blown up.” Sirius teased and Lily softly punched his shoulder, causing Sirius to over dramatically grab his shoulder and fall into James’ arms.

“I’ve been hit! Go on without me James, my love for you will go on forever.” Sirius said and closed his eyes sticking his tongue out. James pulled him into a tight embrace, and pretended to sob into Sirius’ shirt. 

“My wife, you killed my beautiful, loving. Mostly beautiful, wife!” James said in fake agony. Lily was trying to hold back laughter but failed miserably, Everyone in our circle started to laugh including Sev. 

“Oh, so you think I’m beautiful, James?” Sirius asked with a huge smirk across his face. James winked at him before dropping Sirius on the ground, Sirius hit the floor with a groan and clutched his heart in fake agony. 

“You guys are literally a old married couple.” Peter laughed clutching his stomach.

After the three boys were kicked out from being too loud, Lily and Sev left leaving me alone again. I hated the hospital wing, I’ve been in here for nearly a week because of my stupid condition. Lily only started being able to visit me 4 days ago, Sev started 2 days ago and the only time James, Sirius and Peter came to visit was today. I shrugged to myself and stared at the ceiling, at least tomorrow I can start classes again. 

Sirius, James and Peter crossed my mind as I began to fall asleep. They were trouble makers but they were very close, almost as if they were brothers. James has invited me multiple times to join them but I don’t know if I could do that to Sev or Lily. Maybe they won’t care if I don’t do anything bad to them, right? I should join their group. 

I solemnly swear they are up to no good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *jazz hands* 
> 
> This chapter took so long for me to write because I wasn’t on my regular schedule for school. But! I hope you guys like it. 
> 
> *throws TT promo in there*  
> If you haven’t already follow @asktheboywholived on tumblr. I was inspired by ‘So It Begins’
> 
> Also if there is anything else you guys would like to see in this series lemme know! Your ideas might make it in :)


	5. The Halloween Prank

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s Halloween and The boys want to cause some chaos.

It was the day before Halloween, James, Sirius, Peter and I were sat in a circle on the floor of the Gryffindor common room. Night fall was slowly approaching as we tried to come up with a plan for the attack prank, James wanted to use a charm that his dad told him about which makes people dance whenever someone within a 5-meter radius says ‘Gryffindor’. I thought it was good but not good enough. Sirius wanted to use a jinx that he learned to make the whole Slytherin House to trip whenever they walk. Peter wanted to serve the other tables worms instead of food at the Halloween feast. 

“Those were good but they’d never work. We’d get caught.” I said and ran my fingers through my hair. Suddenly as if I were running into a brick wall of ideas an idea occurred to me.

“Pumpkins that explode and paint the entire Slytherin common room and everyone in it will end up with Gryffindor face paint and robes for weeks.” I said and James, Sirius and Peter looked up at me their faces instantly bright. James looks like his kid just won a football game, Sirius patted my back. 

“Good one Rem. I know how to make the pumpkins explode on a set time.” Sirius said and grabbed a piece of parchment, he started to write down the spell to make them explode. Now we need to figure out how to get the colors in, how to make them stay, and how the hell we’re going to get into the Slytherin common room. 

“I can get the color bombs into the pumpkins, I also have a serum that we can use to make them stay on for ages!” Peter squeaked and Sirius wrote it down, along with the spell that Peter told him. James was staring at the floor, his face was scrunched up in concentration. He looked up and looked at Sirius, raising his eyebrow as if he was asking a question. Sirius nodded understanding immediately and James smirked. 

“I have this cloak, it’ll be able to get us into the Slytherin common room if we can find a Slytherin to follow.” James said and pulled a folded up piece of cloth, he unfolded it quickly before throwing it over himself. His body was suddenly not visible, I sat up completely straight in shock and leaned forward to touch where James’ face was before. He was still there but he was invisible. 

“It’s an invisibility cloak, my dad gave it to me before I left for school.” James pulled the cloak off and smiled mischievously. For the rest of the night we sat in a circle around the fire. James and Peter were leaned against each other snoring softly. Sirius was sleeping on a chair in a rather uncomfortable position, and I was sitting across from him trying to fall asleep. 

The next morning, James was already awake and preparing the equipment, Peter had left a plate full of food for me because I woke up late. Sirius was looking in a book for once in his life for the spell that he was going to use. We stole books from upper class men or used the ones in the library to expand our knowledge. Peter placed the serum and a bag full of color bombs into a smaller bag that was enchanted to be smaller on the outside. 

“Morning Rem.” James chirped and sat next to me with my plate of food, I smiled and took the plate from him. 

“Thank you, Pete.” I said and started eating my breakfast. We were planning on planting the bombs into the Slytherin common room while they had lunch so the common room would be very empty, once the bombs were planted they’d wait to set them off until right before the dinner. They had also planned to have Juliette spread the word to a Slytherin girl who she knew about why all the Slytherins had to be in the common room at exactly 5 pm, when the bombs would be set off. I finished my breakfast and began to help Peter put pumpkins into the enchanted bag. 

As lunch rolled around we finalized any packing and headed towards the dungeons where the Slytherin common room was rumored to be. We stayed close together because the cloak was barely able to cover all four of us, every once in a while someone would almost trip on a shoe or a misplaced stone. We reached what looked like a door etched into stone, the two pillars on either side of it had snakes wrapped around them. 

“How do we get in?” James whispered turning to face us. Sirius and Peter shrugged, I shook my head and pulled them off to one of the sides of the doors. 

“We have to wait until someone comes in or out, we don’t know the password, if there is one.” I whispered and they all looked at me. Footsteps broke the silence of the damp dungeons, two people were coming around the corner. I placed a finger over my mouth to hush them and turned towards the noise. Sev and an older blond, almost silver haired, boy appeared at the end of the corridor, Sev was walking fast to keep up with the taller boy. 

“I can’t believe you forgot the password again, Severus.” The older boy hissed at Sev causing his head to slowly drop lower. James and Sirius let out a soft snort. I covered their mouths with my hands as the blond boy looked in our direction, but dismissed it. 

“Pure-blood.” The blond boy whispered to the wall that had a door shape carved into it. The carvings started to shift and change into a large wooden door that swung open, the blond haired boy walked in and Sev followed. We hurried past the door and slid into a corner of the huge common room. The walls were lined with large bookshelves filled with books, Windows leading to the lake were framed with black velvet drapes. The soft green light from the lake illuminated the room, along with fire places that were scattered around the room. The fireplaces were all surrounded by an assortment of soft chairs. 

“Merlin...” James whispered as we all looked around the huge common room. The common room was nearly empty besides Sev and the blond who were searching for something. 

“Lucius, help me find it. Please.” Sev pleaded as he looked around the common room desperately. Lucius Malfoy sighed and helped Sev look for his missing object. Eventually they gave up and left the common room, we kept the cloak on as we searched for anyone who stayed behind. No one was in the common room. 

James took the cloak off of us and Peter pulled out the small pouch he had been carrying filled with our things. He handed Sirius the bag filled with the bombs, and they walked around the common room placing the pumpkins filled with the bombs. James and I started using the spell that makes the bombs explode at a set time. Sirius and Peter ended up putting some into the dorm rooms. After we finished we threw the cloak back over ourselves and quietly ran back to the Gryffindor common room. It was empty besides some 7th years who were studying for who knows what. 

“That was bloody brilliant!” Sirius chirped as he jumped onto the couch and stretched his legs across it. James sat down on the other end of the couch, and Peter sat on a chair next to the couch. They began rambling on about how gross and dingy the Slytherin Common room was. But it wasn’t, it was grand and museum like, but comfortable at the same time. If you were brought down there by blindfold you wouldn’t know it was a dungeon on the inside. I eventually sat down on the floor in between the three boys. 

Lily and Juliette eventually joined us, Lily sat next to me and Juliette sat in between James and Sirius. We sat there talking about random things, waiting until dinner. 

“Remus? How’d you get your scars?” Juliette asked, my breath hitched in my throat and my face turned bright red. I looked down at my hands as I thought of an excuse but my mind was blank. I was usually good at making excuses but it was so sudden and random that she asked me, I wasn’t ready. 

“I-I have a cat?” I stuttered, more of a question than an answer. She scoffed and James laughed, along with everyone else but Lily. Lily had her eyes on me the entire time, when I looked up I knew she could tell that I was desperate for a change in subject. 

“Did you guys finish your homework for DADA? It’s due tomorrow.” Lily said turning to the group of people on the couches. They all looked like they’ve seen a ghost, clearly they didn’t do it. They all quickly got up and rushed to grab their things to start doing their homework. Lily looked back at me, I wasn’t looking at her but I could feel her stare. 

“Later?” She quietly said before grabbing my hand. I nodded slowly, it had to come out sometime I didn’t know it’d be this soon though. The group ran back down and sat on the floor waiting for Lily’s assistance. Lily squeezed my hand before letting go and turning to the group. 

Dinner time approached and the whole hall was filled with floating jack-o-lanterns. It was 1 minute to 5pm and there were no students at the Slytherin table, James, Sirius and Peter were looking at the table with the biggest smirks on their faces. 

A loud explosion came from the dungeons along with screaming and the sound of running students. The hall went silent, James and Sirius held their hands over their mouths to try and stop them from bursting out laughing. The Great Hall doors swung open, angry Slytherins covered in Gryffindor face paint and robes that had the Gryffindor symbol on them stormed into the hall before sitting at their table. The Gryffindor table erupted in cheers as they watched them sit down. 

“Silence!” Dumbledores voice boomed over the hall. It instantly fell silent as the last few Slytherin students made their way to the table. Their faces were covered in the Gryffindor colors or painted as Lions, scowls were etched into all of their faces. 

“It seems there has been an incident involving the Slytherin and Gryffindor houses.” He said looking directly at James, Sirius, and Peter with a knowing look. He looked back around at all of the students in the hall. 

“But the show must go on. after the feast I would like all the Slytherin students to report to Madam Pomfrey so she can switch your robes back.” He paused and looked at the Gryffindor table again. 

“I would like all Gryffindor students to head straight to your common room after dinner for questioning.” James and Sirius secretly high-fived each other, mouthing ‘worth it’. 

“Now, if there is no more interruptions. Let the feast begin!” 

Food appeared on the plates as it did every feast, on regular days it was usually there when we got into the hall. We ate and laughed about how ridiculous the Slytherins looked in the Gryffindor colors. Some of then attempted to take off the paint with pieces of cloth, but nothing worked. That night after dinner was long because we had to be questioned, but luckily no one was blamed because everyone’s stories matched up. During dinner we planned on what to say because everyone, besides Lily, thought it was the best thing to happen so far. 

The Gryffindor tower was a tower of happiness that night. After questioning some of the 7th years brought out their hidden fire whiskey and drank in celebration. Not much sleeping went on that night either, unless you were Lily who went to her dorm straight after she was questioned. I admit I felt bad for Sev, but it was just a harmless prank It’s not like anyone got hurt or anything. I fell asleep that night with a warm feeling spread around my body and a smile on my face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *jazz hands* 
> 
> Hello Lovelies! I’m sorry this one took 7 years for me to post, I kept going back and changing everything before I got it to how I wanted. I was going to add a dash of gay but I realized they are only 11 & 12\. *weeps* 
> 
> Credit for the color bomb idea goes to @ asktheboywholived on tumblr. (TT is literally my inspiration for all of this 


	6. The Big Secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s Lily’s Birthday and of course it lands on the full moon.

I woke up to a sharp pain pulsing throughout my head and sweat pressing my hair to my forehead. Lily’s attempt at a pain relief potion last night didn’t help much. My heart was beating faster than normal and my eyes were clouded. I slowly stood out of bed and stumbled towards the bathroom, my brain didn’t even register the sound of water that was coming from the showers. I gripped onto the sides of the sink my knuckles turning white as I stared at my pale face. My eyes looked as if I had been crying all night, the dark circles underneath them were dark purple making me look sick. The top lip of my mouth slightly protruding because of my growing canine teeth. I looked like a monster. 

“Remus? Are you alright?” A soft voice rang through my ears, I looked towards the voice and found a startled looking James, his messy hair was sticking up in places like it normally did. I didn’t move, I was too scared to move, I was paralyzed. James moved closer to me furrowing his eyebrows in confusion. I slouched down lower and looked away, he can’t see you like this. 

“You look sick, Remus. Do you need to go to Madam Pomfrey?” He asked pressing his hand to my forehead to check my temperature, I shook my head. 

“I’m alright.” I muttered, moving quickly around him and back out to the dorm room, I sat in my bed with the curtains closing me off from the rest of the dorm. My heart beat was back to normal and I wasn’t sweating as much. I ran my fingers through my hair, it’s not time for them to know yet. 

After I heard James head down to the common room I left my bed and took a shower. Lily wanted to have a little get together today with Sev and I for her birthday.

Lily and I walked to the usual spot where we met Sev, the courtyard that was directly in between the two common rooms. Sev was waiting with a small package on his lap, he was making snowflakes dance as if there was wind blowing them. He smiled as he saw Lily and I approaching, mostly Lily though. I knew he only tolerated to hang out with me because Lily always had me with her, we had never hung out without her. He stood up, hugged Lily and shook my hand. 

“Happy birthday, Lils.” He sung holding out the small box towards her. She smiled and took the box. 

“Thank you, Sev. But you didn’t have too.” She said hugging him again, He shrugged. 

“I wanted too. Now open it.” He said anxiously, he slightly bounced on his heels in anticipation. She opened the small box and inside was a necklace with a metallic flower that looked handmade, or magic made. Lily gasped in amazement at the necklace, Sev gestured for her to turn so he could put the necklace on for her. She turned back to him and softly held the necklace, smiling widely. 

“Thank you so much Sev.” She beamed at him. He smiled back but his was not as bright, James and them have been being meaner to him recently and it was taking a toll on his emotional health. I felt bad for him but there isn’t much I can do, James, Sirius and Peter were my friends. I think they’re my friends at least. 

We spent most of the day sitting in the courtyard, it was cold, but not too cold to be outside. Sev started a small fire to keep us warm, we would’ve stayed inside one of the common rooms but we are two different houses and houses aren’t supposed to go into each others common rooms. Lily insisted that Sev held her hand because it was cold, I was basically third wheeling but Lily was always there for me so I’m always here for her. 

As nighttime grew closer my body began to ache as it prepared to be basically ripped apart for the night. I started to twitch my leg so I could distract my pain and focus on Lily. 

“I should probably head back, Malfoy wanted to have a talk with me.” Sev sighed and stood up, Lily and I followed his actions. Lily pulled Sev and I into a tight group hug which was super awkward for Sev and I but it was her birthday. 

Lily and I were making our way back to the common rooms when my head started to spin. I grabbed the nearest wall and slid onto the floor, the edges of my vision turning a deep almost black shade of red. I didn’t notice how dark it was getting, the moon was starting to peak over the mountains. 

“D-Dumbledore.” I stuttered in more of a low growl than a whisper. Lily nodded and ran towards the headmasters office, I clutched the front of my jumper and doubled over in pain. My eyes were pulsing as if my heart was inside of them, my heart was pulsing faster than ever. I tried to drag myself in towards the whomping willow, but I could barely move. 

• Lily’s P.O.V. •

My heart was racing as I knocked harshly on the door to Dumbledores office. The door swung open and he looked at me shocked. I probably looked like I was going mad, I think I am going mad. 

“Remus. Near the prefects bathroom” I huffed trying to catch my breathe from running. He nodded and lead me back towards where I left Remus, McGonagall showed up out of no where to follow us. When we reached where I left Remus he was gone, there were large scratch marks on the stones and a small pool of blood. I covered my mouth with my hands and gasped. 

“I-I left him here, where is he? Is he going to be alright?” I stammered rapidly staring at the pool of dark blood on the stone floor, my hands started to tremble. Wherever he is, he’s bleeding a lot which cannot be good. McGonagall and Dumbledore started to talk in low whispers, I could barely hear any of what they were saying besides the names of a few teachers I knew. McGonagall nodded and turned to me, her face was filled with worry. 

“Lets get you to Madam Pomfrey and we can talk about this, alright?” She cooed wrapping an arm over my shoulder and leading me to the hospital wing. Her hand was caressing my shoulder trying to comfort me, nothing would comfort me more than knowing Remus was okay. We entered the Hospital wing and McGonagall sat me down on a bed before talking secretively to Madam Pomfrey. Madam Pomfrey occasionally turned to glance at me but immediately turned away when her eyes met mine. My whole body was stiff besides my hands which wouldn’t stop shaking, my breathing was uneven and heavy. My best friend is either dead or roaming around seriously injured. I can’t do anything to help him, I wanted to get up find him. Make sure he’s okay. My mind kept racing about things that could happen to him, the forest is dangerous. A sharp whimper of pain from a wolf broke the silent buzzing, my eyes widened. Did he get attacked by the wolf? There was claw marks in the stone. 

McGonagall sat next to me and handed me a cup of warm tea. I held the tea in my hands trying to stop them from trembling but it didn’t help. She looked at her hands for a while thinking of what she was going to say, perhaps. She nodded to herself and looked at me again a sympathetic look washing over her face. 

“Your friend, Remus, has a condition. One that he can’t control or get rid of.” She paused as I placed the tea onto a small table next to the bed. What does she mean by condition? Is he going to die?

“He’s most likely going to be hurt when he returns to normal, which he’s used too. He’s also not dead.” She paused again grabbing one of my hands trying to comfort me. He’s hurt, and I can’t help him. Did I make it worse? My eyebrows furrowed in thought and confusion as words swam around my head. 

“He’s used to it because Remus is a werewolf. I’m not supposed to be telling you but I thought it might bring peace to you.” She sighed and shook her head. My breath hitched, I couldn’t move. My body went numb as her words bounced around my head. Remus is a werewolf. I didn’t know werewolves were real, I thought they only existed in children’s books and stories told by your parents. Werewolves are mean and vicious, Remus can’t be a werewolf, he’s to kind. The room began to spin and my body went limp, the soft cushion of the bed engulfed my body as everything went black. 

• Remus P.O.V. •

I woke up in the hospital wing, flashes of last night flooded my brain. I turned before I could get to the shack, Dumbledore and other teachers tried to get me to the safe zone but I fought back only to end up hurting myself. I shook my head trying to get rid of the memories, my body was stiff as if I had been in bed for days. It was normal, after the full moon I was basically immobile for a week sometimes two if it’s a bad moon. I looked down at my heavily bandaged torso, the bandages had small patches of blood on them. 

“Remus?” A small voice cracked from next to me, I followed the voice to see Lily sitting next to me. Her hair was messy, her eyes were bloodshot, the bags around her eyes were a deep shade of purple from lack of sleep. It broke my heart to see her like this, She is usually very cheerful and always had a smile that could light up a thousand rooms. She pulled me into a tight hug, hurting my bruised ribs but I didn’t care I just hugged her back. The last thing I remembered as a human, was her looking at me as I fell to the floor her eyes filled with fear. 

“I’m so happy you’re okay, Rem. I thought something killed you.” she muttered into my shoulder holding the hug tighter. A while after she let go of me, her face was lit up again but she still looked like a tired mess. She was biting the inside of her cheek looking like she was about to burst with how many questions she was holding back. I smiled at her and gestured in a way that said ‘ask away’. 

We sat there for hours, her asking my questions and I answered to the best of my ability. It was around lunch time when Sirius, James, Peter and the Juliette girl joined us in the hospital wing. Lily and I had both been in the hospital wing for 4 days. She passed out from not breathing when McGonagall told her about my condition. I felt terrible that she had to go through that on her birthday, birthdays are supposed to be happy and my damn condition ruined it. She said it was fine but we agreed to have a little party once I was able to go back to class. 

Sirius and Juliette seemed oddly close during our meeting. James kept whispering something in Sirius’ ear that made him become flustered. I shrugged it off because it was normal for them. I wasn’t very fond of Juliette though, but I wasn’t fond of James and Sirius until a while after either. 

The next couple of months flew by and Lily was very respectful and never brought up my condition around anyone, she knew that if the word got around the school that I was a werewolf I would have to be kicked out of the school. When we were alone she asked more questions about it, but mostly asked if I was feeling alright. I was scared that she’d never want to be around me after the incident but our friendship only grew. James wouldn’t stop trying to have me ask ‘Evans’ out for him. He was jealous of how close we were, he thought I liked her like that but I see her as my best friend, my family. Sirius and Juliette’s friendship sparked, they were the worst troublemakers in the entire school. Peter was starting to make friends from other houses and was very interested in DADA. As our first year at Hogwarts rushed to an end our friendship grew stronger, making us an unbreakable team. We were truly marauders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *JAZZ HANDS* 
> 
> I have so much fun writing this, I always sit in class and just think about what to put next in this series. I hope you guys are enjoying it too. Thank you guys for reading this! 
> 
> Also if there is anything else you guys would like to see in this series. lemme know! Your ideas might make it into the story :)


	7. The Bat-Bogey hex of 1972

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a very short chapter about the Bat-Bogey hex of 1972. P.O.V is James

Remus was stuck in the hospital wing like he was every month. I don’t know why he was always sick or why he always had bandages covering his body. Maybe he’s just very clumsy ending up putting himself up in the hospital wing every month. It didn’t matter though, Sirius and I had a plan to keep ourselves busy for the week without Remus. We had planned to do it with Remus but we had to substitute him for Juliette. 

It was O.W.Ls testing time for fifth years and Sirius wanted to cause one last scene before we finished our first year. We thought it would be the perfect time to try out one of a few hexes we’ve been learning about, The bat-bogey hex. The bat-bogey hex caused bats to fly out of the persons nose. 

“James let’s go!” Sirius shouted from downstairs in the common room, I grabbed my wand and the invisibility cloak before running down the stairs to meet him, Juliette and Peter. Peter and Juliette were set on lookout while Sirius was going to talk to the professor who was watching over the exams. We walked out of the common room and threw the cloak over ourselves and snuck down to the great hall. Students weren’t allowed near the Great Hall during the tests because it would interrupt the exams, if only they knew. 

Peter and Juliette snuck out of under the cloak when we got to our assigned spot and the coast was clear. Sirius got out of under the cloak and fixed his bun. He opened the door and walked through, leaving enough space for me to sneak through the door. The room was filled with desks neatly placed into rows, Everyone was staring at Sirius. The teacher motioned for him to come to the front, Sirius followed his instructions. 

I searched for our target, a fifth year Slytherin named Narcissa Black was sitting in the corner of the room glaring at Sirius with a look of disgust. I guess she’s going to regret that. I slowly walked closer to her pulling out my wand, I was right next to her and I looked at Sirius waiting for his signal. He snapped his fingers four times, the signal, I lifted the cloak over my wand quickly and whisper recited the hex. A jet of yellow light flows from my wand hitting Narcissa, I pulled my arm back into my cloak and backed away from her. 

She started to sniffle and rub her nose in irritation. Suddenly, a loud shriek came from her mouth as a bat flew from her nose. Sirius turned away from the professor and smirked. Bats swarmed out of Narcissa’s nose which caused the rest of the fifth years class to start screaming and some to swarm towards the doors of the great hall, I pushed past them and through the doors to find Peter and Juliette. Sirius was safe for now, Finding Juliette and Peter we found our way to a small hidden room. This was our check point where we would wait for Sirius. A few minutes passed before Sirius finally showed up, he was smiling more than I have ever seen him smile this whole year. 

“That was bloody amazing James!” He cheered pulling me into a tight hug, I hugged him back. It was more of a very tight bro hug than a regular hug we patted each others backs. Peter and Juliette nodded in agreement to Sirius’ comment. I’m glad that I caught Narcissa glaring at Sirius, it would’ve gone to wait if I didn’t. 

“Let’s head back to the common room before we get caught.” Sirius beamed and messed up my hair. I grabbed the cloak and threw it over us before heading back to the common rooms. 

That night when Remus got back from his hospital stay all we talked about was the chaos that we had created for the fifth year girl Narcissa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *JAZZ HANDS* 
> 
> Hi! I’m sorry it took me 70 years to write again. But I did it! It’s almost the end of the year! *weeps* My babies are growing up. 
> 
> Also if there is anything else you guys would like to see in this setied lemme know! Your ideas might make it into the story :)


	8. The End of Year 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief overview of the train ride home along with some summer parts.

7th July 1972, Remus, James, Peter, and Sirius were all in a carriage pulled by an invisible force to the train platform. Once on the train they got into the same compartment they arrived in, Lily, Sev, and Juliette were also crammed into the compartment made for six people. Juliette sat next to Sirius, Sirius was in between her and Peter. James was sitting next to Remus on the other side of Sirius, Peter and Juliette. Sev sat next to Remus, Remus had criss-crossed his legs so Lily could sit comfortably in front of him on the floor. Remus had offered to take the floor but Lily denied him. All of the harsh feelings towards anyone flew out the window, Sirius was much happier because of the Narcissa incident. James, Peter, Juliette and Sirius didn’t say anything mean to Sev the entire ride. Sev was smiling, Lily was laughing, everything was perfect.

The compartment was filled with a warm feeling of happiness and laughter. A group of friends who were all very different. A Slytherin boy, a werewolf, a boy from a family who hated anyone who was affiliated with non-pure-bloods, a muggle born girl, a spunky metamorphmagus, a small boy who was insecure, and a boy who could see the best in everyone. They all came together by causing chaos wherever they went.

When the train stopped at the platform not a word was uttered from the group as they pulled each other into a group hug, before they exited their compartment. The warmth still surrounding each of them, they went their separate ways for the next 2 months.

27th July 1972

_Dear Remus,_

_I hope this owl gets to you on time, I know you just went through your first moon back at home. I just wanted to let you know that I wish I was there to help you. When we come back I’ll hopefully have learned how to perfect my pain relief potion.  
I know how much you love chocolate and tea, I hope I chose the right kind._

_Love, Lils._

  
Sirius often visited James’ house when his parents were out at parties. Sirius and James would play quidditch the whole time with a few other kids around where James lived. Sirius often brought his little brother, Regulus, along. James instantly became friends with the younger brother.

Peter spent most of his summer on a vacation with his family. As soon as he got his letter for supplies he bought them all and began studying.

Juliette experimented with her hair color a lot, she would go through 2 different colors a day. At the end of the summer she stuck with an electric blue color, it made her eyes pop.

Lily and Severus spent the summer days outside together, practicing spells. At night Lily was reading potion books that Sev had lended her. She almost perfected a pain relief potion, but it was ruined by her sister who ‘accidentally’ added a dolls hair to the mixture.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *JAZZ HANDS*
> 
> Are you guys ready for Year 2?! I have some things up my sleeves. *wink* *wonk* I know they’re like 12/13 but should I add a dash of love? Or should I wait until book 2 when they’re 13/14?


	9. The New Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The marauders start their second year!

The wave of security and comfort washed over me as I walked through the entrance onto the platform. The last couple of weeks were unbearable, Even though I was on bed rest basically in a coma for most of it, due to the moon. I had missed school and causing trouble with Sirius, James and Peter. I missed sitting in the Library with Lily where she’d ramble on endlessly about her potions homework. I missed spending time in the hospital wing when they were all allowed there after the moon, they all got along as if nothing was wrong. 

“Remus!” A voice squealed behind me, a smile spreading across my face as I recognized the voice. I turned around as Lily ran towards me and gave me a bone crushing hug, I hugged her back slightly lifting her from the ground. Sev was glaring at us but I didn’t care, I missed Lily so much over the summer break. 

“I’ll see you after the ride, yeah?” Lily said and let go of the hug. I nodded, she was leaving because of Sev. 

“Don’t let him change you Lils.” I whispered, pulling her back in for a quick hug. She smiled at me and placed her hand on my arm. 

“You worry too much Lupin.” She laughed and walked back to Sev. Sev’s glare disappeared when he noticed Lily looking at him. Lily and Sev had recently started getting closer over the summer, almost like they were dating.

“Lupin!” James’ voice rang, Peter was next to him. James’ famous smile was etched across his face, he gave me a quick hug. James had grown taller during the summer, Unlike Peter who looks like he shrunk. I was the tallest, then James, Sirius and lastly Peter. 

The train whistle sounded when the clock hit 11. Peter, James and I were already in our compartment waiting on the arrival of Sirius. He never showed up, our compartment was sickeningly silent on our way to the castle. Everyone was lost in thought, probably thinking about why he didn’t show up. Did he get transferred because of the trouble he was causing? We never got caught though. Did he transfer because he hated Hogwarts? There has been many cases or disappearing witches and wizards over the past couple of months, there was also a large amount of deaths that went along with it. Was he one of the unlucky ones? 

Lily and Sev joined the carriage on our way up to the castle. James talked about quidditch the whole time, as usual. When we sat down at the Great Hall table there was a boy with short black hair sitting at our usual spot, his head was hung low and he was staring at his hands. I was sitting across from him, I watched him trying to figure out who he was. If he was a first year he shouldn’t be here yet, maybe he was an older transfer student. His cheekbones were very prominent and he looked elegant, probably from a wealthy family. He slowly lifted his head up to look at me, my heart felt as if it had dropped to my stomach after realizing who the boy was. 

“Sirius?” I whispered, he nodded slowly. His vacant expression was heart breaking. A feeling of relief washed over me but it was quickly replaced with one of anger. He shook his head as if he were reading my thoughts and looked at his hands again. The sorting ceremony began but I kept staring at Sirius, maybe if I stare long enough he’d be back to his normal self. 

“Black, Regulus!” McGonagall’s voice caught me off guard. Sirius had a brother? I looked up at the black haired boy who looked almost exactly like Sirius did last year. Regulus looked more terrified than Sirius did when he was getting sorted, he sat on the stool and the hat dropped over his eyes. 

“Slytherin!” The hat hissed, the Slytherin table cheered and Sirius’ head shot up with a look of terror as he watched his brother walk shakily to the table across the room, James looked at Sirius with a shocked expression.

During the feast Sirius didn’t eat anything and James was silent. Sirius was staring across the room at the Slytherin table, watching his little brother. Apparently Sirius had been trying all summer to get Regulus into a different mind set than his parents had put him in by having Regulus around James. When Sirius got caught his parents grounded him and to rebel Sirius cut off his hair, or so he told me. 

After the feast Sirius slipped away to Dumbledores office and I grabbed James to silently follow behind Sirius, wanting to know what’s going on. James hid us under the invisibility cloak so we could follow him into the office. Sirius pounded on the door to Dumbledore’s office like he was going to break it down, the door swung open and we followed Sirius into the office. Sirius’ arms were crossed and his feet stomped across the floor. 

“The sorting hat was wrong. You can’t let him stay there.” Sirius’ voice hissed, Dumbledore put down the Daily Profit he was reading and pushed the his half moon spectacles higher on his nose. 

“The sorting hat is never wrong, what makes you so sure he doesn’t belong in Slytherin?” Dumbledore asked calmly watching Sirius pace the floor in front of his desk. Sirius glared at him for a second and started pacing again.

“He’s not a bad person, he’s not a Slytherin.” Sirius’ voice cracked, my heart sunk lower into my chest as Sirius stopped pacing and looked in our direction. He looked like he was going to cry at any moment. 

“Not all people in Slytherin are bad, Sirius.” Dumbledore said, Sirius’ face scrunched up in confusion and he looked back at Dumbledore. Dumbledore nodded like he was reading Sirius’ brain, Sirius shook his head in disbelief. Sirius stormed out of the office, James and I quickly followed him. Sirius stopped suddenly and sat on the stairs, his face dropped into his hands. My heart shattered and I tried to get closer to him to comfort him but James kept pulling me towards the common room, we needed to be in there before Sirius was. Once we were far enough away from Sirius, James took the cloak off. 

We entered the dorm rooms and James quickly changed from his school robes into pajamas, I grabbed my pajamas and pulled the curtains around my bed shut. Sirius entered the dorm room, James started talking to Peter about Quidditch. I was about to put my shirt on when the curtains of my bed were pushed open, Sirius was standing there staring at my exposed torso. I quickly slipped my shirt on and smiled at Sirius like nothing even happened, his cheeks flushed as he watched me. 

“Sorry.” He muttered and walked away to an empty bed, I opened the rest of the curtains around my bed to watch him. The room was now silent and everyone was looking at Sirius waiting for when he’d tell us what happened, but it never did. Sirius ended up taking off his robes before heading into the bathroom to shower. James, Peter and I ended up talking about what could have happened to him until he came out of the shower. He acted as if nothing happened before his shower, he was talking to us about his summer with James. It was around 2 am when they finally fell asleep, James and Sirius were sleeping on the same bed while Peter was sprawled across his own. Sirius never slept by himself, he always either slept in James’ bed or on the plush chair next to James’ bed. At first it was weird for me but over the summer Sirius basically lived at James’ and it was expected they shared a bed. Last year sirius had asked me if he could share with me but I would say no due to the chance of having the nightmare, but I haven’t had the nightmare since then. I wouldn’t mind sharing a bed with him, James doesn’t mind it, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *JAZZ HANDS*   
> Bam bam chicken and ham! Second year is not going to be as exciting as first year or any other year, it’s kind of a filler year I guess XD
> 
> Also if there is anything else you guys would like to see in this series lemme know! Your ideas might make it into the story :)


	10. The Big Bad Wolf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prisoners escape from Azkaban as a Supermoon approaches.

At breakfast the whole hall was filled with the panicked whispering of students crowding around each other. I sat in my usual spot where Sirius, James, Peter and Juliette were crowded behind a Daily Profit paper.

“What’s going on?” I questioned tilting my head to try and get a glimpse of the paper. James put the paper on flat on the table so I could read it.

_“Escape from Azkaban! 6 Prisoners escaped from Azkaban last night including Alecto Carrow, Amycus Carrow, Antonin Dolohov, Avery Snr, Evan Rosier, and the werewolf Fenrir Greyback.”_

My heart felt as if it had dropped into my stomach, I couldn’t breathe. The sight of his face smirking up at me on the page brought back memories of the night he attacked me, the coppery smell of blood penetrated my senses. I closed my eyes trying to calm myself down but he was still etched into my brain, the yellow glow of his eyes, the way his teeth tore through my skin, his low laughter sending shivers down my spine.

_“Hello little one.”_ His cold voice rang through my ears. I shook my head to try and erase the thought of him, he can’t hurt me here, I’m safe. I took a sip of my tea trying to quench the thirst of blood that lingered on my tongue and burned the back of my throat. The warmth of Lily’s hand spread across my back, soothing the piercing pain that ran through my spine. A forced soft smile spread across my face as I looked over at her, she knew about Fenrir and how I became the monster I am.

“He’s building an army to try and take down the Ministry.” Juliette stammered, her hair had turned from the bright blue to a midnight blue color when she was reading the paper. The Wizarding war was close, He who must not be named was having his group of followers have been running around killing innocent people to get information on the Ministry. No one knew why he wanted to overthrow the Ministry but everyone knew that if he did succeed, everyone who disobeyed him would be killed.

The entire school was silent for the rest of the day, Professor McGonagall didn’t show up in class either. The Professor who was teaching Transfiguration in place of McGonagall started talking about Animagi which we weren’t supposed to learn about until third year, but the class went along with it. At lunch some of the students were missing, rumors are that parents are pulling their kids out of the school or they’re joining the death eaters on going against the Ministry.

“Remus, we’re having a little party tonight if you’d want to come. Just to raise the mood.” James shrugged before stuffing his face with more food, Sirius nodded and swallowed his food.

“Some of the 7th years snuck in some fire whiskey, gigglewater and some alcoholic muggle drinks.” Sirius gushed wiggling his shoulders in excitement, I don’t think they’re even scared about the escapees from Azkaban.

“I have a meeting with McGonagall.” I said not thinking as I finished the large mound of food that I had piled on my plate. Dumbledore told me to use meetings as an excuse for my absence during the moon. Lily kicked my leg under the table, I looked at her with my eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“McGonagall isn’t here today?” Peter said, as more of a question than a statement. My eyes grew wider at the realization of what I had said, She isn’t here today.

“What he meant to say is that we have a meeting with Slughorn for potions tonight.” Lily stammered trying to cover for me, James and Sirius nodded pretending to believe her lie and went back to talking about Quidditch. I mouthed ‘thank you’ to Lily and headed back to the common rooms. My head started pounding as I made my way through the corridors, I could feel the warmth of my blood as it pulsed through my veins. The sun was setting behind the mountains, stars starting to speckle the sky.

I made my way to the whomping willow, a wave of unease swept over me as I entered the small tunnel. The usual creaking of wood echoed through the halls as the wind blew against the shacks walls. The door to the room I stayed in was open, swaying with the wind. I cautiously walked into the now spinning room as a wave of dizziness flashed over me. A deep chuckle echoed around the room, I slowly turned in the direction the sound came from to see a familiar dark silhouette was standing in a corner of the room, the yellow glow of his eyes dimly illuminating the room.

“Remus Lupin.” Fenrir’s hoarse voice cooed as he slowly walked towards me. I stumbled backwards into a corner, wincing as my back pressed against the wall. He laughed moving even closer to me, his laugh sent shivers down my spine and I slid down the wall making myself appear smaller. I scooted closer to the wall hoping that I might dissolve into the old wood walls. He crouched down to my level and placed his claw like fingernail on my cheek, shaking his head.

“I’m not here to hurt you, little one.” He hissed, with a swift movement he made a small gash in my cheek. The blood trickled down my face and his softly wiped it away before standing up. My hand reached for the gash on my cheek, wincing at the contact.

“I’m here to help you in this vulnerable time.” He chuckled against his palm as he sucked the remaining blood off of his hand. The familiar pale light shone through the window lighting up the room, the moon was larger than normal. My body ached as the moonlight spread across my skin, a muffled sound of pain erupted from the back of my throat. Fenrir fell onto his hands and knees, his back hunched tearing through the coat he was wearing. I tore at the shirt I was wearing creating a few more scratched to add to my collection. My eyes screwed shut as I doubled over in pain, my bones crackled and popped out of place. My mind was racing with thoughts of tearing apart someone, piece by piece. Fenrir howled and sprinted out of the door, I tried to stop myself from following but it didn’t work. I sprinted after him towards Hogsmeade, the sweet smell of blood wafting through my nose. The smell grew stronger, almost unbearable as we entered the small village.

Fenrir lead me to a small house that had no lights on inside, it was far enough from the village that their screams wouldn’t be heard. My heart began racing as the sweet smell fogged my brain, I needed this. He broke open the door and slowly made his way through the house, I unwillingly followed. My brain was fighting against the wolf instincts, telling itself to go back to the shack and wait until the next morning. My body roamed into an open room where a small boy was laying in bed, peacefully sleeping. Taking deep inhales of the scent coming from him, I slowly crept closer. My mouth began watering, the smell of blood was intoxicating. My brain was fighting against my body as I was inches from the boy, he moved in his sleep. I stood still, my body freezing as the small boy turned to face me. He was innocent and unaware of what was going to happen, just as mine had been before Fenrir attacked.

A low growl came from behind me, I whimpered and backed into a corner of the room. Fenrir strutted into the small room, his face was already covered in fresh blood. Hungrily Fenrir attacked the small boy, leaving his limp lifeless body covered in blood, mangled and unrecognizable. He walked over to me and growled angrily at my lack of participation in the little game he was playing. He slashed the side of my head causing me to yelp in pain and bare my teeth. The wolf let out a howl that sounded more like a laugh before he sprinted out of the small house and headed away from the shrieking shack. My body shook and I watched the blood spill from the wounds on the small boy, the scent drove me wild and the room began spinning again. I quickly ran out of the house and back towards the shack before anyone could notice me or before I would end up going on a rampage. _I am a monster._

Most moons weren’t this bad, I don’t usually have any memory of the night because I turn fully. Last night I had to use every inch of strength I had to stop myself. My mind was trapped to watch the scenes of last night as they happened and not be able to do anything about it. I was exhausted the next morning and stayed inside of the shack, curled up on the old bed staring with a blank expression into a corner waiting for nighttime to escape back into the castle. I limped towards the hospital wing but collapsed in front of the door, my body was too weak to continue. Fenrirs laugh echoed through my head along with the image of the small boys body, no older than I was when Fenrir had attacked me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *JAZZ HANDS* 
> 
> Hello lovelies! I wanted to have a more angsty Remus chapter, so I did. It will get angstier as the time goes on. But yes. Also the Prisoners are not all Prisoners they’re just people I found out were in the first wizarding war with moldy voldy so I put them in Azkaban and had them escape. Fenrir wasn’t even in Azkaban at that time. 
> 
> Also if there is anything else you guys would like to see in this series lemme know! Your ideas might make it into the story :)


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